Do you need to free yourself from all the Christmas expectations this year? Reclaim joy before December rushes by in a miserable haze of disappointment.
Godly Parenting,  Holidays

Free Yourself from all the Christmas Expectations this Year

(Last Updated On: November 26, 2018)



Do you need to free yourself from all the Christmas expectations this year? Are you starting to feel like December slides into January in a miserable haze of rushing around and the “not enough” voices echoing in your head?

Where does all this pressure come from?

Often times, we invite it in! We scan Pinterest for ideas, but end up feeling like our homes are less than. We watch holiday movies with perfect homes and magical decor.  And we compare with our friends and family, especially over social media. We end up feeling driven to create the perfect, spectacularly magical Christmas, and bind ourselves to unreasonable Christmas expectations.

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The problem is that those perfect holiday movies aren’t realistic. So, we’re holding ourselves to false standards that aren’t fair, and really aren’t about celebrating Christ at all.

My mommy heart wanted to offer her every precious thing that would bring her joy, but I knew the better lesson in disappointment.

And we set ourselves up for failure, robbing ourselves and our families of so much joy.

Too many of my friends and family are feeling the weight of Christmas expectations already. Thanksgiving has barely ended, but the pressure is so high to make the entire month of December spectacular, to fill each day with magic and meaningful moments.

Even amongst Christians, we succumb the idea that we’re supposed to be celebrating advent, volunteering, giving, packing shoeboxes, buying cows for villages in Africa, purchasing only fair trade gifts, joining the choir, making sure we have the right kinds of ornaments and decorations, and doing all the parenting and marriage things.

And we’re heaping tasks on ourselves that Jesus never meant us to have.

Set yourself FREE of those Christmas Expectations right now!

One, manage your own expectations.

Surrender to God the Christmas wishlist of your heart, and ask Him what things you should keep. Ask your spouse what things are important to him. Be willing to let some things go.

I guarantee you that your family will enjoy your peaceful, joyous heart more than a million seasonal activities.

Secondly, be realistic with how much you can do while having peace and joy.

God calls us to reflect a quiet, reverent, gentle spirit of righteousness and love. Those things need to come at the top of our to do list before we start piling on the activities.

Joy to the World – Round Wooden Wall Art
from: DaySpring Cards Inc

Choose your battles!

You can’t do everything. What are the most important parts of the holidays for you that are manageable? Hot chocolate, candy canes, and Christmas movies are pretty magical with very little effort.

Add some whipped cream to that cocoa and you are super mom, I promise.

Decorations don’t have to be HGTV worthy the day after Thanksgiving (or ever). Some years we’ve tackled one task a day for a week. Last year, my tree was half-lit for 24 hours. I had a sinus infection and thought I was dying. It took me two days to finish stringing the lights, but I kept perspective and joy which spoke louder of my Jesus than having a perfectly lit tree would have.

Every year will be different. Don’t box yourself in with self-imposed schedules.

The year my husband was deployed, I was on my own with a colicky infant and working full-time.  I put up a two foot high, slightly tacky Walgreen’s tree from a box. And it was enough. My daughter’s first Christmas was magical because of family, not because my house looked like Martha Stewart decorated.

That pesky elf might be really important to your child, but everyday doesn’t have to be a huge deal. Make it harder to find instead of an elaborate production each day. My daughter has the most fun when she can’t find hers and has to really search.

Play your favorite Christmas music as often as possible. Everything is more magical to an amazing sound track. Even if life is hard, Josh Groban singing Ave Maria takes my breath away and reminds me to focus on why we celebrate.

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Manage your expectations for your children.

When you do summon energy to plan and organize something special, the kids will often not cooperate. They’ll be too young for your favorite holiday movie or hate the music you cherish.

They will miss naps and have too much sugar. Company throws everything out the window.

Expect your kids to be the tiny maladjusted tyrants they are when their schedules get disrupted.

via GIPHY

It’s okay.

Your children didn’t get the memo this is supposed to be fun/amazing/magical.

Consider their attention span, energy level, and interests in your planning. My daughter REALLY wants to see the Nutcracker but the production at our local theater is three hours plus an intermission.

There is no way I’m spending $100 to take her to that for her to spend three hours fidgeting in her best dress and trying to jump out of her seat. But her friend is in a shorter dance company version, and we can still enjoy the holiday classic and support her sweet friend.

Take time to recognize the magical moments that happen naturally, like laying on the floor coloring our advent color calendar together listening to Christmas music.

Embrace JOY

The Christmas season celebrates the grace that God sent to walk among us. We lose touch with that Grace when we heap faulty and impractical expectations on ourselves, our families, and on the holiday itself.

At the end of the day, Christmas wasn’t the day Jesus was born, not really, and the hype is over in less than an hour of torn paper, gleeful screeches, and disappointed “socks” groans.

Having joy in Christ should last all year long.

Do the things this Christmas that leads your heart closer to His.

You don’t have to spend an hour a day journaling or mapping each verse to have quiet time that counts. Even if your Bible time is listening to the audio version on your phone, having the right heart is all that matters.

Last year we added reading a Character-Filled Christmas by Megan Ann Scheibner to our holiday traditions, learning about having a heart for giving, service. We’re learning that giving matters most when it costs us something. We add to our list of Christlike character each day after reading a Christmas themed book and opening the door on our advent calendar. It’s been so good to work on my heart over my hearth . . .

Release yourself from the trap of Christmas expectations this year.

Let yourself embrace the joy in this messy, beautiful life without worrying about the perfect tree, daily magical excursions, or any of the craziness we are led to believe everyone else is doing. 

The only expectation that really matters is the expectation of Christ’s coming and just resting in His love is always exactly enough.



Free Yourself from all the Christmas Expectations this Year

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