Do you ever feel rejected?
I have been really struggling with rejection the past few weeks: gossip, slander, unkind messages, ignored phone calls. Praying and working through this issue, I’ve realized feeling rejected has colored on the canvas of my entire life (but I’m in good company).
I remember being happy and confident as a child. Then the first day of kindergarten, I somehow didn’t fit. I was called cruel names. No one asked me to play during recess. A cruel boy ruined my new ‘cowboy’ boots in second grade when I left them in the coat room. I was rejected and bullied mercilessly throughout elementary and middle school.
Sophomore year, it eased up some as my braces came off and my hair grew out from an unfortunate Dorothy Hamill bob that was NEVER a good look. But rejection followed me to college, into adulthood, even as a military spouse. And I internalized being rejected as definitions of ME.
“I am weird.”
“I am unlikable.”
“I am ugly.”
“I am fat.”
“No one will ever really love me.”
“My thighs touch.”
“I always mess things up.”
“I’m a failure as a mother.”
“I’m not worth loving.”
“I’m not a good enough Christian.”
And Satan uses it all, whispering fiercely into my head and heart.
As Revelations 12:10 says, our enemy accuses us day and night. He is the constant liar.
Even just a few days ago, I lay sobbing from the painful sting yet again. If I am doing this Christ-thing right, why do people reject me? Am I even a good person? Am I a good mom? Am I a good Christian even though some people don’t like me?
1 Peter 2:4-8 ESV “As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. For it stands in Scripture: “Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone, a cornerstone chosen and precious, and whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.” So the honor is for you who believe, but for those who do not believe, “The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone,” and “A stone of stumbling, and a rock of offense.” They stumble because they disobey the word, as they were destined to do.”
I read this passage from 1 Peter and realized that I’m chosen and precious to Him. Then I wondered why am I giving these people so much power over my life? What gives them credibility? If it isn’t God, why am I listening!?!1 Peter 2:4-8 'rejected by men, but in the sight of God chosen and precious. Oh <3 this! Click To Tweet
God chose ME as precious. He reached into my miserable little life and calls me beloved child. He is building me into a spiritual house. If I am being transformed by Him, their definitions do not matter.
“. . . whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.”
I am so easily manipulated by today. I forget that in the end God won’t let me be put to shame if I’m following His will for my life. Just keep taking one step toward Him each day, the rest will take care of itself.
Jesus was rejected and offended people; He made people angry. They rejected Him to the point of crucifixion. And He was perfect.
I’m not perfect. I can’t expect for everyone to love me. I sometimes have ‘openmouthinsertfoot-itis.’ I can keep growing as a person and Christian, but what I cannot keep doing is letting people dictate how I define myself when God already gave me His definition.
1 John 3:1-2 ESV “See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Beloved, we are God’s children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is.”
God’s love defines me. He carves my beauty out of the mud and muck in which I’ve so long been mired. The Master of the universe chose me before the foundation of the world (Ephesians 1:4).
How dare I hold onto these labels of lies, of blame, and rejection, questioning who I am, when what I will be has not yet appeared?
Oh, the hope in that appearance, that I will someday appear like Him as I labor to be transformed by Him.