How to be Right So People Will Listen

Knowing how to be right so people will listen is not a skill I’ve mastered. I’m working on it, but it does not come naturally, at all.

I’ve always been the kind of person who has next-level skills of thinking I’m right, sometimes even when I’m not. GASP.

Becoming Christlike means I have to actively unlearn almost every single character trait, but especially my all too human instinct to believe I’m right.

However as Christians, our worldview is right: God is real. The Bible is His divine word. Jesus is the Messiah.

But there is a wrong way to be right.

Being right the wrong way can destroy relationships and our Christian’s witness. In fact, a negative attitude or dismissive tone can push people away and ruin any chance they will ever talk to a Christian again.

Learning how to be right takes grace and confidence and wisdom.

Which is why I am so glad I read Talk the Walk by Steve Brown

As Christians, we are often encouraged to walk the talk and put our lives where our mouths are, which we should do.

But Steve Brown turns that expression on its head and challenges us to Talk the Walk, sharing his insights on how we can talk about Christianity in a way that opens hearts and minds to our faith.

His subtitle, How to be Right Without Being Insufferable, is humorous and poignant, as is his book.

As Christians, we can know with confidence that our worldview is truth. However, we live in a post-truth culture. Many people claim that there is no objective truth, only personal truths.

And learning how to share THE truth with those who need to hear it is more important than ever, even as it grows more difficult.

In Talk the Walk, Brown addresses our heart issues first. We should grieve for those who are lost.

Too often, Christians see non-Christians as the enemy when they are simply victims of our true Enemy.

We forget that we wage war against enemies that are not flesh and blood.

Steve Brown rightly teaches that we need to do better at coming from a place of love and compassion before we can hope to speak truth into the lives of others.

Luke 6:27 ESV “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you

We can’t share the gospel message if no one will listen. Man, have I been guilty of forgetting that.

Knowing all the facts doesn’t mean I know how to be right.

Knowing how to be right is important whether you’re a relatively new believer or have been in ministry for decades. In fact, the more enthusiastic I am for Christ, the more I need to remember the lessons of this book. It’s easy to get passionate and lose sight of the main goal, to open hearts and minds to the gospel of Jesus Christ.

I especially appreciated Steve’s gift for writing. His voice is profoundly uplifting and inspiring while deeply convicting. His writing is a rare gift with equal parts eloquence and charming humility. He instructs and guides without being preachy, proof that he understands the delicate balance between knowing the truth and getting people to listen.

Talk the Walk makes a great companion piece to Greg Koukl’s Tactics, which is an excellent book on how to start faith conversations with people and do so in a way that helps people examine their own viewpoints and consider Christianity more clearly.

Being a good Christian doesn’t always mean we’re all called to argue people into the kingdom. Yet, we all should stand up for truth in a way that respects people, even when we disagree with their ideas because in the end, we’re ambassadors for Christ whether good or bad.

The truth will offend; we don’t need to.

But now, any speech that offends is seen as violent and intolerant, even if it’s demonstrably true, because our culture has allowed our feelings to become the indicators of truth instead of the truth informing our feelings.

So sharing our faith takes skills that don’t come naturally. It takes peace and humility in the face of hurt and anger. A lot of wounded people need our love and care before they can be open to hearing about Jesus.

Though, mindfully sharing the truth doesn’t mean diluting it. We need to share that truth without watering it down, but also shouldn’t try to share it via fire hose.

No one can drink of even the Living Water from a fire hose.

Brown suggests that how and when (or even IF) we share the truth in this climate requires deep spiritual discernment, as does knowing how much to share.

One of the biggest risks as Christians is that knowing the truth can also make us arrogant and mean. We start placing divisions and setting requirements that Christ never did.

We end up fighting with other believers instead of working diligently to reach the unreached. Secondary spiritual issues need to take lesser priority to sharing the Gospel message.

Steve Brown’s book has been really important for me as a woman who is sometimes too passionate and too political. It reminds me to let Jesus continue to work on my heart, so I can more effectively share who He is.

We need to let Jesus change us before we seek to change the world.

If you want to change the world, reach people for Jesus, you have to learn how to be right so people will listen. And know when to leave people in God’s hands. We know that God loves each person in our lives infinitely more than we do. He will not let them go if there is any hope for them to be saved.

Sometimes, we have to do our best to live our values, love people, pray for them, and let God work.

Even Jesus did not speak plainly when people with hard hearts and closed minds were listening. He refused to perform miracles around those with no faith. In Luke 9, He told his disciples if people would not receive them to shake the dust from their feet and leave.

Even when we can’t always find the right words to share our faith, we can always learn to love people better.

And that is how to be right so people will listen even when the world is content to be wrong.