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How to Save your Marriage When War Comes Home
When a soldier comes home, War comes home, too. When my husband came home last time, it was our hardest yet. He came home to a stressed-out wife starting her next school year and a toddler daughter he barely knew. Reintegration was going to be tougher than it had ever been on top of the extreme stress of cumulative deployments. Reintegration means readjusting, remembering things we took for granted: Where is my place? What is my role? How do we do this together? For me, a small positive of deployments is getting to organize my house to my little OCD heart’s content. I get to color code and label. And…
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Divorce him for the Dishes by the Sink?
Divorce? He leaves dishes by the sink occasionally. Sometimes, he doesn’t pick up his dirty underwear and believes dusting is a waste of time. He rolls his eyes when I disinfect the kitchen. He gives it a lick and a polish when I would use bleach and a flamethrower. And my personal pet peeve – If I give him a ‘to do’ list, my husband will find the one thing he’s been meaning to do that is NOT on my list, and do that. These things can drive me crazy or hurt my feelings. Sometimes, I feel disrespected and ignored . . . but divorce him? Not even kind of.…
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Bloom in Any Season
Last Sunday, I held this beautiful rose in my hand as it bloomed defiantly in November. I heard God’s quiet whisper, “Even this rose can bloom in any season.” What wonderful encouragement! I have been truly relying on God during this difficult season in the Army, tired but coping. And isn’t that when the bottom falls out? the minute we think we have it all together? the minute we try to do it ourselves . . . God was encouraging me after the month we’ve had. My husband has been gone 18 hour days, 6-7 days a week, most Army related but some hunting, and selfishly, I get tired of…
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Beautifully Taken for Granted: Building Trust in Marriage
Who WANTS to be taken for granted? You’d probably have thought there was something wrong with me if you had walked into my kitchen two years ago late at night after a long day and found me giggling. I was giggling to myself over a sink full of dirty dishes because after 9 years of marriage, countless hours of diligent sacrifice, my husband finally, beautifully, had taken me for granted. I worked really hard to be taken for granted. (this site uses Affiliate links-purchases support our ministry through a small referral fee that never affects your cost.) That sounds really crazy, I know, but the reality is I never saw…
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Its Own Way: Having 1 Cor. 13 Love in my marriage
Sunday, my husband and I decided to cook spaghetti together. We had different ideas about making the sauce. Tomato sauce is one of the few things that I have worked to perfect, so I started to fight for my way. What should have been a simple discussion about which step should go first, started to be about who was a better chef, smarter, and generally the most rightest person in all the universe. I silently prayed for the right heart in that moment, and adjusted my attitude before it became a fight. Yet, I should have stopped before I started. The next day, God pointed me right to what He…
